Hypothetical History

Okay, time to inaugurate a new segment. For a while I've been writing little lists of people's names, and I suppose you could call that a segment, so now we'll have another one in the hopes that providing some sort of framework will enable me to write more frequently.

I would just like to take a moment to say, by way of disclaimer, that nothing in these segments are true, to the best of my knowledge, and unless they are about public figures, the characters appearing aren't real people. Blah blah parody protected under the Constitution blah.

No this is not about, "What if the South had won the Civil War." This is what I imagine must have gone on in the back room somewhere during various periods in history, humorously portrayed so as to point out some of the idiotic things people have done during humanity's short stay on the planet. Also, I may be blatantly insulting and possibly sacrilegious. I'm not sorry.