Video Letter

Dear Internet,

I do not want to see that video. I've said it before, I'll say it again. I don't want to see that video. There are some things which are only accurately consumed via motion pictures (digital or otherwise) but guess what, that's not one of them. That would be more accurately consumed via text, because it is text-based.

Remember back when you used to do nothing but serve text? Remember how there were people who wanted you, Internet, to offer multimedia options, like sound. They said things like, "You can't read music, you have to hear it." I agree, Internet. You can read music, but it's not the best way of hearing it, certainly. Indeed, I venture a guess that reading music isn't a very good way of consuming music at all. You also can't really read art, nor can you read movies.

So you gave them pictures. Then sound. And then you gave them video. And now, you're offering video for everything. Programming tutorial? Video. Sure, you could just write the text and it would be easier and more useful, but by God you've got the technology and you're going to use it until we beg for mercy.

Is this in retaliation for all the people who complained about text back in the old days? Did we offend you? On behalf of all the jerks who maligned you back when you were just green, mono-spaced text on a black screen, I'm sorry Internet. We wanted you to be better than you were, we wanted nothing but better things for you. But obviously, we got out of hand.

So no, Internet, I don't want to see that video. I don't want to take 10 minutes to hear what I could have skimmed in 5 seconds. I want to be able to copy and paste text, which, unfortunately, you can't do from a video. I'm not saying that all videos are bad, but that one, in particular, is unnecessary and needs to be retooled into some nice, clean, mono-spaced text.

Can't we go back to the way it used to be, Internet? I promise, I'll never stray again. I'd never hit a loosely-bound network of computers. That Denial of Service attack wasn't me, I swear. Let's just go back inside and work things out calmly.

Love,

A Concerned Citizen